Blessed

These past few weeks have worn me down. Benji in the hospital. Me being seriously afraid for his life, (for the first few hours)....then coming home.

Trying to get back to normal for a week, then we get hit with the stomach bug. Praise the LORD Emery never got the virus.

Jesse was the worst, lasting for about a week for him. Benji and I both had it about 24 hours.

This week however, I have been reminded....

Renewed.

Thankful that it was JUST a stomach virus, JUST an unknown virus that sent Benji to the hospital.

So many people are suffering REAL illnesses, lifetime sickness, REAL loss.

So this week I was just thankful. Thankful that my family is healthy. That we have an awesome house (normal by American standards- Castle by World wide standards). We have so much to be thankful for.

I am feeling back to my "normal" self again. I am loving life, loving the every day, loving the place God has put me.

I am...We are so so blessed.

I'm Green. Until I'm Not

I'm green. No for real. I take the call of being a Christian very seriously and part of that call, I feel is to preserve the planet He has created for us.

I mainly use "green" products. Trader Joe's has the awesome all purpose cleaner that I have used for awhile to clean everything, counters, bathrooms, windows, glass, high chair, table, whatever.

Whole Foods has awesome, cheap detergent and all purpose scrubbing cleaners for the tubs, tile, etc....

A few years ago I quit buying napkins and paper towels. I started back after my mom gave me a Costco size box of paper towels when Jesse was born. I was addicted so fast again!

Then my dishes washer went out. SERIOUSLY! So I continued our paper plate consumption, which we also started when Jesse was born. It was just so easy when people were bringing meals for us to have paper plates and not have to worry about the dishes.

I used to recycle obsessively. We have recycle pick up and I swear we always have the most on the curb. They don't pick up glass so I used to take our glass to the local recycle center myself.

I know I sound crazy. I accept that. I am OCD...No really. I'm diagnosed. If I told you all the things that run through my head....YOU'D really know.

Anyway. We had even starting composting all our compostable material to fertilize our garden. We acquired a rain barrel to catch rain so that we could water our garden with out running up our water bill.

WE WERE GREEN, PEOPLE.

I had no products with HFCS. I had switched most of our flour products to whole wheat. I was making so much progress!

Our garden was awesome!

Then we went and had another dang baby.

He put a kink in my greenness.

And THEN....THENNNNNNN. These past two weeks happened.

Let me tell you. My greenness went out the window with the stench of vomit and diarrhea.

I RANNNNN to the nearest Walgreens and bought all the Clorox products I could find.

Today I have been washing anything and everything that can be washed. I've been boiling paci's, toothbrushes, (because I JUST bought new ones after Benji was in the hospital). I have moped and swept and scrubbed and wiped every surface.

It's been a long day. I'm so over winter, and illness and stench and cold. I am ready for summer and health and being green again and warm weather!

Dear Sleep

No Allergy Problems Here

Well, it did end up being the stomach bug Jesse had and he lovingly shared it with Benji then Me. Emery (as of today) has not fallen prey...

But I'm holding my breath. Today is the first day Jesse has had no symptoms, since Friday! That's a long time for a baby to be sick. He definitely had it the worst. Thankfully the nurse on call told me to put him back on his formula since it was soy. I was really concerned because we had just switched him to mainly table food and whole milk.

Which does NOT agree with the stomach bug. He has stayed pretty active and playful, we've just had a lot of messes.

I feel like just throwing all the clothes, sheets, towels, blankets, everything out and starting over! It is nasty up in here.

Benji spent all Monday in the bed, Then Tuesday I spent all day in bed. Wednesday (today) Benji went back to work....BOOOO! leaving me, not yet fully recovered home with the babies. At least Emery had school this morning so I got a few more hours of rest while Jesse took his morning nap.

I know that's the only way it can be done and I really try not to complain but I think that is the hardest part about being a SAHM. I can't send my kids to daycare and take a sick day. BUT I MADE IT!

Tonight was Wednesday night church meal, so I had my first food tonight and sweet tea. I think that sweet tea was the best thing I've tasted, ever!

Benji lost 12 POUNDS!!! CRAZY!!! He did have a head start on me with his 3 day hospital stay. I've only lost 5. I know it's all water weight but it sure is fun to see those numbers go down! It adds a little positivity to an otherwise horrible month.

Another positive note is that I haven't been outside so I haven't had any issues with the pollen...yet.

My Brain, Fried, Smothered and Covered.

Here is all I can muster up the courage to blog at the end of this week. I am exhausted and drained and fragile and D.O.N.E.

Tonight I got home from running some errands and Jesse was fussy, so I was holding him trying to console him.

And then this happened....

REALLY!!!!! I know a lot of mom's have been puked on. Probably numerous times.

BUT, this was a first for me. Thankfully we have dodge the "stomach bug" bullet for the most part. Emery had it once a year ago. I had it a few times when I was pregnant with Jesse, which actually turned out to be most likely issues with my gall bladder. (I mean does a person really get the stomach bug 4 times in a year???) any way, I haven't had an issue since I had my gall bladder out.

We just had last week to recover from Benji's crazy maybe meningitis scare. It wasn't meningitis, thankfully. It wasn't about a 100 other things either.

They are just calling it a virus that mimics meningitis. Go figure.

I wanted so bad for tonight to be a night of relaxing as a family....haha. Once we all got cleaned up and calmed down we did actually get to eat a relatively peaceful dinner on our porch. Emery loves to eat outside (almost as much as I do). So we grilled some burgers and chilled on the porch while the sun went down. I LONG for these moments with my family. Being in the line of "work" we are in we are seldom at home all together for an evening. I ache for moments where we can just relax as a family. KIDS AND ALL!!! Jesse seemed to be feeling better after his vomit episode, haha. so he ate some and drank some water and didn't fuss anymore after he hurled all over meeeeee......... hopefully it was a fluke and NOT  a virus. I don't think I can handle any more viruses this year. 

  Dinner on the porch. One of my favorite things! 

Panic, Over!

Okay. I can breathe now.

A few days ago I couldn't.

For those of you who don't know my very healthy, never takes an Advil, never misses a day of work, husband came down with what everyone thought was meningitis last Monday.

It wasn't meningitis-THANKFULLY.

But....it wasn't the flu either, or strep, mono, MRSA, UTI, pneumonia, some heart virus??? and about 50 other things they tested for.

We were in the hospital for 3 days.

We left with no answers and he still had a fever.

Our family physician thought it would be best if we met with an Infectious Disease specialist since Benji is out of the country so much and hunts in the woods 9 months out of the year.

To rule out malaria and Lyme disease.

That's when I started freaking out. The appointment with the specialist went great though. He really helped calm my nerves and reassured me that all the test he ran would probably come back negative as well.

So Benji gave 9 more vials of his blood and we were off again.....

It will be funny one day I'm sure. Today is the first day he hasn't run a temp. He is feeling tons better.

Whatever this was really shook me up and knocked him completely off his feet for a week.

We are so thankful for our family that stepped in and took care of the kids, for our church family that prayed, sent meals, emails, etc.

Taking it easy this weekend and hoping that he will be back to healthy on Monday.

Contagion

WHAT A FRIIICKKKKINNNNNN WEEEKKKKKKK!!!!!! 

this is all I'm going to leave you with right now. i am too exhausted to explain and if we are friends on Facebook, or in real life you know the story. 

Tomorrow we head to Infectious Disease Control Center to see if we can find some more answers. 

I at least NOW have a legitimate excuse for my Xanax prescription, right???? 

It is ON!

I gave my self until Jesse turned one. 

That was last week. I am starting my game plan and once I set the goals. 

I won't back down. 

I am ready.